Uptown Toughies

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 25 Jun 2009, 12:50

My gang is now taking applications. if u feel that u have the spunk, the moxie, and the willingness to kill a bitch feel free to apply today! note: being part of the Uptown Toughies requires u be atleast 18 years old and be a citizen of the united states or a person who has atleast been to ottawa ontario and survived. the application process will consist of an interview and then an initiation where u will undertake a 5 minute beating by senior members wielding balled up socks inside of another sock. this is to insure u are really serious about being an Uptown Toughie and that u can hold ur own in the heat of battle. if interested, please contact our cheif of administration of our ottawa branch Viano L. Olololololol. he can be reached at 1-613-Toughie, thats 1-613-868-4443. or reach him at his email Loves.the.dick@live.com. we hope to hear from you and would love for u to represent our gang.

Sincerely,
President and Top Swinging Dick,
Duckwalk

P.S.
We are having our annual potluck dinner on July 4th. bring the whole family! there will be live music, fireworks and free malt liquor for the adults and ecto cooler for the kids! bring a dish to share and if its anything like last year itll be a blast!

Uptown Toughies is an Equal Oppertunities Organization

Unread post by **Plastic Jesus** » 25 Jun 2009, 01:02

Don't bring that weak ass shit to O'ahu or you'll get a moustache beatdown bitch.

Unread post by **Plastic Jesus** » 25 Jun 2009, 01:14

We don't put up with lawlessness in LA.

Unread post by **captainAngry** » 30 Jun 2009, 07:54

I have never been to Ottawa but I have drank milk out of a bag before. That should just about cover Ottawa. Also, I have the beard of an up and coming lumberjack with nothing to loose.

Any chance you will accept my application?

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 30 Jun 2009, 11:02

well u already are qualified seeing as ur above the age of 17 and are a citizen of the US. once we go over ur application there will be a formal meeting where u will get to meet our senior members and ask any questions u might have. this will be followed by brutal sock within a sock beating and depending on the manner in which u behave during the beating, we will be able to determine where u would best serve the Uptown Toughies and what position to start u at. seeing as ur beard is quite gnarly, i figure a captain status right off the back depending on how the interview goes. finally u will be initiated into the gang and given ur honorary denim jacket and title. we will then celebrate ur success like only the Toughies can, board games, malt liquor, and grilled cheese sammiches!

Unread post by **captainAngry** » 30 Jun 2009, 11:09

Just to clarify, it's a Denim Members Only jacket with the Toughies logo Beadazzled on the back, right? I don't know if I can pull off a regular Denim jacket.

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 30 Jun 2009, 11:17

doesnt matter. as long as its denim u should be good. lay off the beadazzler tho cause i mean... we are the Uptown Toughies, not the uptown fruitcakes.

Unread post by **4most** » 30 Jun 2009, 12:02

Duckwalk wrote:doesnt matter. as long as its denim u should be good. lay off the beadazzler tho cause i mean... we are the Uptown Toughies, not the uptown fruitcakes.

lol

Unread post by **Ghost** » 30 Jun 2009, 12:29

the tunnel snakes can kick your ass , yo!

tunnel snakes rule

edit: CAN IZ J0!N?

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 30 Jun 2009, 12:58

Ghost wrote:edit: CAN IZ J0!N?

i dunno. do u fit the requirements?

Side note:
i figure if the toughies are to be a credible gang we are gunna have to start recruting young and get some BG's into the mix. not only does it promote loyalty later on in their lives but people under the age of 18 are more susceptible to recruting tactics. thanks to the countless hours i have spent watching Gangland on the history channel, i know for a fact that getting them young is how its done. kinda like the tobacco companies... only tougher.

Unread post by **Wamp Rats** » 30 Jun 2009, 02:00

I'm not above 17, but i'm still badass.

Plus, you need at least one young member to make you look more badass

Unread post by **Original** » 30 Jun 2009, 02:41

As a senior member of the UpDown Roughies I gotta say I believe you are a bunch of copycat sissies. Get your own name, you are clearly trying to copy us.

I call a rumble. I will pick you UP and throw you DOWN the niagra falls. Then you'll be on the right side of them and that's a start.

Wamp, you can join us, we allow anyone over the age of 13, why? Because we are not a 'the man wanna be gang' imposing restrictions on members due to stoopid reasons like age. We require only to be of age of puberty. If you are under 13 and have pubes you can be excepted.

captian, you should also join us, you know only a man who is secure enough to bedazzle is truly man enough to join.

Oh, now I see you are also copying us by lowering your age requirements, my god, have you no backbone.

Gangland, sheesh, I would expect The Uptown Sissies to watch gangland to learn how to act tough. We MADE Gangland, We ARE Gangland, go cry to your mom now.

Unread post by **Ghost** » 30 Jun 2009, 07:00

im from the united states. but im not 18. I GUESS I CANT JOINZ? NOOOOOOOO. but duckwalk u kno u want me in the gang. u know that im a super leet gangster.

PS

TUNNEL SNAKES RULE

Unread post by **HurTmePlentY** » 30 Jun 2009, 10:29

ill apply.

19 born in the good ol' usa.

Unread post by **genie** » 30 Jun 2009, 10:57

I wanna join.

Unread post by **Plastic Jesus** » 30 Jun 2009, 11:18

I think any women folk that want to hang out with the Uptown Toughies will have to apply to the companion female version, the Uptown Snugglies.

Unread post by **Original** » 30 Jun 2009, 11:48

Again, just a copy of the UpDown SnuggleMuffins.

Unread post by **Ghost** » 01 Jul 2009, 01:08

We all kno the tunnel snakes are true gangsters.

tunnel snakes rule

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 01 Jul 2009, 11:52

Basically im sayin if u want to join the Toughies u can. just some of u will join as BG 's and have to work ur way up the ladder by doing gang affiliated stuff. we will prolly start BG's off with stuff like running errands and selling drugs. we will then get them to do robberies n shit. when they commit their first murder THEN we can talk about becoming a G. basically a lot of things need to be worked out but i figure the Uptown Toughies could use a few BG's to mix shit up and get our name out there. i mean, Kaiser and Viano can only kill so many people :/

Original wrote:you know only a man who is secure enough to bedazzle is truly man enough to join.

yeah... u just summed up the "Roughness" of ur gang right there. u should prolly go ahead and rename urselves the Back Door Roughies cause u know... that would look great bedazzled on the assless chaps u guys go prancing about the city in. now gtfo my recruiting thread or ima get viano to whip u silly and fuck ya stupid

Unread post by **Gypsy Joe** » 07 Jul 2009, 12:37

Why am i here duck?

I was born to be a Toughie!
i come from an uptown street corner known as Ann arbor.
Up there i'm known as crazy face and when i use my silly voice changer its roxan.
i took these pre mug-shot, mug-shots for ya!

Unread post by **KEKEKE** » 07 Jul 2009, 08:37

Or you toolboxes could join my super sweet bike gang The MidTown Huffies.

Unread post by **captainAngry** » 07 Jul 2009, 09:16

Downtown Uptowns

Unread post by **KEKEKE** » 07 Jul 2009, 09:54

Uptown Muffies

Unread post by **Gypsy Joe** » 07 Jul 2009, 11:13

My Whores i manage are in the uptown muffies

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 07 Jul 2009, 03:11

KEKEKE wrote:Or you toolboxes could join my super sweet bike gang The MidTown Huffies.

the huffies are bitches. they are the Socs to our Greasers

Unread post by **genie** » 07 Jul 2009, 10:47

can the girl associates be white denim?

Unread post by **Gypsy Joe** » 07 Jul 2009, 10:48

layin down some old school outsiders shit on that post?

Unread post by **Duckwalk** » 08 Jul 2009, 12:12

Yes and yes.

Unread post by **Gypsy Joe** » 18 Jul 2009, 12:28

Is This the sign up or the base of operation? or both? either way... what branch or division am i in or in charge of? I'm in the middle of starting the southern branch of the toughies with fridg as soon as he nuts up and joins this bitch.

Unread post by **Sastora** » 18 Jul 2009, 11:12

White Denim! Sweet..

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