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Endangered tf2 creatures?

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HurTmePlentY
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Endangered tf2 creatures?

Unread post by HurTmePlentY »

Hello, fellow Fortressologists! As we all know, the Spycrab has been endangered for a long time now. But have you ever heard of his even more rare and endangered cousins! Take a look at this safari guide to find out how to save each of these lovely species.

Spycrab: The most well-known of the endangered animals, the Spycrab is defenseless, save for the newer offshoot of the breed, the Dead-RingSpyCrab. There is also a even more rare Albino Spycrab. He is almost transparent.
How To: Take out your disguise kit while crouching and look up. Simple as that.

The DemoPimp: The often intoxicated cousin of the SpyCrab, the DemoPimp is an aggressive best by nature. But his instincts have been dulled by centuries of drinking.
How To: Take out the bottle, crouch, and look up.

The SniperHumper: THis animal is the mocking one out of the group. He countiuously humps the, as if mocking everyone around. Unlike the other animals, they have a severe dislike for SpyCrabs.Thanks to Melee Heavy for the info.
How To: Take out your Sniper Rifle, look up, crouch, and continuously zoom in and out.
Videographic Evidence: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hUH4vcK0EU

The TurtleHeavy: The sweet, loving cousin. This species warms their triangular eggs in their right hands. They look up at the sky most of the time, and thus have to rely on the other animals to defend their eggs while away. This practice is known as "Nomming". THe one food that a SpyCrab eats just happens to be TurtleHeavy eggs.
How To: Same routine. Sandvich, crouch, and look up.


The SoldierBanger: The close cousin of the SniperHumper, he walks around the field just hanging around, taunting the world.
How To: Rocket Launcher, look up, crouch continuously.

The ClakClakScout: The fastest couisin of the chain, this birdlike trckster uses his batlike arm to hit his ball-like tongue to stun his prey.
How To: Sandman, look down, hold M2.

The EngiRunner: This slow-moving member of the Clasium family is the smartest of the bunch. He cranes his long neck up towards the sky, pondering the universe and why god hates him.
How To: Pistol, look up, PROFIT.

On a related note, there seems to be another evolution forming in the chain. It can manifest as almost anything.
The Civilian: The rarest of all, he has almost been exterminated by the Valve pest extermination company. But he always finds new forms to become. He is the pinnacle of the evolutionary chain.
How To: Switch the remember last weapon option on, and join an arena match. Lose, and tada! You have become the civilian.

Thank you all for your concern.


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http://forums.steampowered.com/forums/showthread.php?t=974995&highlight=spycrab
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