calculatedChaos Gaming

For reasons unknown even to myself I have been playing this game a bit more recently. I blame my extended absence on my being old and fearing change.

I initially tried to come back a while ago but there were hats everywhere and backpacks had items with levels on it and I thought I had accidentally loaded up some MMORPG so I quickly uninstalled and changed all of my credit card info fearing I had made some sort of nerdy mistake whilst in the midst of a routine alcohol induced blackout.

Turns out I didn't accidentally download KnightsOfStarcraftOnline2 or whatever the kids are playing these days that isn't L4D2, and it was in fact my beloved TF2 only it was free and there were hats and you had a backpack and you could make metal things into cloth hats because this game does not follow the laws of alchemical design.

Needless to say, I was confused and scared and alone. I tried to get over it by headshotting someone but they had something equipped that meant they couldn't be killed by headshots because that is a proper thing to implement into a game wherein a character almost entirely relies on headshots. Completely proper. Not at all retarded.

Regardless, it pains me to accept that this game has changed and that to survive this old dog must learn new tricks, namely tricks that involve crafting shit into less shitty shit. So explain this to me. I could just google it but I don't really feel like it. I feel like you explaining it to me would entertain me more. Hup to.

tl;dr
Crafting. How do?

http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=Tf2+crafting

you said you were too lazy so here.

It just stopped at the search results. You actually expect me to deduce which is the most relevant, click on, sort through the information, allow script exceptions to my script blockers, retain pertinent knowledge if applicable and or find a second or third required source?

You got a lot of growing up to do.


I expect someone here to explain this entire process to me in 17 syllables, in haiku form. Metaphors optional.

KEKEKE wrote:It just stopped at the search results. You actually expect me to deduce which is the most relevant, click on, sort through the information, allow script exceptions to my script blockers, retain pertinent knowledge if applicable and or find a second or third required source?

You got a lot of growing up to do.


I expect someone here to explain this entire process to me in 17 syllables, in haiku form. Metaphors optional.

Try hitting "items".
It's as tan as a dumb rock,
Go ahead, click craft.

You go to Items.
You click craft together once.
You combine weapons.

2 weapons - one SCRAP

THREE SCRAP- ONE RECLAIM
THREE RECLAIM- ONE REFINED
THREE REFINED - ONE HAT

HAT!!
HAT!!!
HAT!!!!
HAT!!!!!

FierySnake wrote:2 weapons - one SCRAP

THREE SCRAP- ONE RECLAIM
THREE RECLAIM- ONE REFINED
THREE REFINED - ONE HAT

That's 16 syllables.

Haunwulf wrote:

FierySnake wrote:2 weapons - one SCRAP

THREE SCRAP- ONE RECLAIM
THREE RECLAIM- ONE REFINED
THREE REFINED - ONE HAT

That's 16 syllables.

I don't care.

see the box
fill till craft light up
click. boom. done.