Corrupt-a-Wish!

[Dep. Redundency Dep.]

Granted. they are stolen and bronzed, and view as an accomplishment of modern technology.

I wish that I could learn languages easier

[thedoghouse]

Granted, but you forget math

I wish for Science

[Vengeful Sinz]

Granted, but with your new knowledge of science you create a dangerous creature and it kills you in the most horrific way possible...

I wish I was Immune to Disease.

[blotzor]

Granted, but everyone else on the planet gets the black plague and dies. Leaving you all alone with your new best friends: the rats.

I wish i could laugh like the Joker, but not be insane.

[thedoghouse]

Granted but after you cut a smile into your face and almost bleed to death everyone assumes you're insane even though you had a logical reason, you then get thrown in an asylum where you are later executed by Adam West for copyright infringement

I wish that I was immune to fire

[hln.LAW]

I wish that I was immune to fire

Granted, you drown.

I wish I could understand and talk to animals

[Ohnoez]

Granted, you drown.

I wish I could understand and talk to animals

Granted, animals tell you to piss of and you go cry yourself to sleep because your not accepted in their animal utopia.

I wish i can FALCO PAWNCH

[thedoghouse]

Granted but you get killed by Falcon Kick to the ovaries for copyright infringement

I wish I had real-life admin powers

[PhrozenFlame]

Granted. You accidentally ban yourself from life.

I wish I had a large metal drill on my right arm.

[TheBlindKhezu]

Granted, i can't say(due to many ways something can go wrong with a large arm drill) well accidentally cut yourself in half when trying to get your clothes on.
(I Have two if it ain't a god damn problem)
I wish i didn't have a rivalry with giggles, and i wish i have four arm(makes my life a lot easier.

[Dep. Redundency Dep.]

Granted, but everyone thinks of you as a freak and sends you to Xenien Persiaes 8 where you spend the rest of your days alone. Ironically enough, this somehow ended your rivalry with giggles.

I wish I owned a cult. That would be kickass.

[thedoghouse]

Granted but it's a cult for killing cult leaders

I wish that I could kill people and revive them at will

[Dep. Redundency Dep.]

Granted, but you're arrested for use of voodoo magic (which is illegal).

I wish I was immortal Friday through Sunday.

[Dick Trickle]

You're killed at 11:59 pm Thursday night

I wish I could get on my favorite Podcast

[BAMF]

You're killed at 11:59 pm Thursday night

I wish I could get on my favorite Podcast

Granted, but halfway through the podcast you ask your girlfriend to marry you and she says no. 11 million people are listening, including your mother.

I wish that my face was stuck looking like this:

[thedoghouse]

granted but it's stuck by use of a hot glue gun that burns your face and causes horrible burns

I wish voodoo magic wasn't illegal

[BAMF]

granted but it's stuck by use of a hot glue gun that burns your face and causes horrible burns

I wish voodoo magic wasn't illegal

Granted, but someone legally puts a curse on both your houses

I wish Toy Story 3 never ended

[thedoghouse]

Granted, but you die of starvation from being hooked on the movie and trying to watch the whole thing

I wish I could control the weather

[Vengeful Sinz]

Granted, but you then cause a F5 twister to hit your state for it was too powerful for you. LULZ

I wish for a demonic hound dog to obey my commands.

[Dep. Redundency Dep.]

Granted, but Haruhiro Tsujimoto calls, and wants his copyright back for Resident Evil 6, the Return of Standard Douchebaggary.

I wish I didn't know that Haruhiro Tsujimoto is the president of Capcom of the top of my head. DX

[Vengeful Sinz]

Granted, but you lose all essence of being a nerd and become a cool kid. Furthermore, you do drugs and Overdose!

I wish I had a brand new car!

[thedoghouse]

granted but it's a buggy that you crash into the back of a cop car while driving drunk, you lose both your arms and legs and get thrown in jail where you get raped to death by a big black man when you drop the soap in the showers and fall out of your chair trying to pick it up with your teeth

I wish I had all the money I wanted, LEGALLY

[Ohnoez]

granted but it's a buggy that you crash into the back of a cop car while driving drunk, you lose both your arms and legs and get thrown in jail where you get raped to death by a big black man when you drop the soap in the showers and fall out of your chair trying to pick it up with your teeth

I wish I had all the money I wanted, LEGALLY

Granted all of the money you wanted is only in monoply



I wish i had a chocolate fountain filled with chocolate flavored chocolate with a side of chocolate chocolate and without getting diabetes/obese

[BAMF]

I wish i had a chocolate fountain filled with chocolate flavored chocolate with a side of chocolate chocolate and without getting diabetes/obese

Granted, but the Norse gods quickly get jealous of your "Chocolate Flavored Chocolate"
Odin rips off your skin because his chocolate isn't chocolate flavored.

I wish that I had this dog:

[Zarik]

I wish i had a chocolate fountain filled with chocolate flavored chocolate with a side of chocolate chocolate and without getting diabetes/obese

Granted, but the Norse gods quickly get jealous of your "Chocolate Flavored Chocolate"
Odin rips off your skin because his chocolate isn't chocolate flavored.

I wish that I had this dog:

Granted but it turns out to be one of those vicous dogs and bitess off your legs and you can never EVER walk again.

I wish that i could never at all

[Vengeful Sinz]

Granted, but now vomit comes out your ass.

I wish i didnt just image what I just granted in my mind

[Dep. Redundency Dep.]

Granted, instead it happens to you.

I wish I had a new hard drive, because mines filled to the brink, and I don't even have porn on it D:

[Vengeful Sinz]

Granted, but the new hard drive is filled with gay porn!

I wish I had a rocket launcher.

[BAMF]

granted, but the rocket launcher can only misfire. So when you shoot it for the first time, it goes through you, your mother, your girlfriend, and Robin Walker.

I wish that I was a tunnel snake

[Dep. Redundency Dep.]

Granted, and life is good. Until Vault 101 is raided by Super Mutants.

I wish I hadn't just spent 3 hours trying to bet Touhou 8 on lunatic (But I still want to prevail! That's right I did it!)